Have you heard the amazing news from the sports world?! Joey Chestnut — the Throat GOAT, Glizzy Gobbler, whatever you want to call him — will be facing off next week against his sworn enemy, Kobayashi, in a historic glizzy eating competition live on Netflix. As you might recall, Joey was BANNED from this year’s Glizzy Eating Competition in Coney Island. First Caitlyn Clark gets booted from the Olympic team, then this. A truly shameful year for sports. Apparently Joseph is no longer valid because he is endorsing a rival vegan glizzy. Weird, but whatever floats your boat, Joey. You do you! We will proudly be watching you pound glizzys from the sidelines!

Don’t Invest in Rats! 🐀

Everyone knows about New York City’s rat problem. But did you know it’s kinda getting solved? You might recall NYC iconically hiring a “Rat Czar,” aka a person to deal with the city's millions of rats. The Czar & Mayor Eric Adams sat down and came up with an absolutely genius idea. After hours of deliberation someone said, “Hey, what if we put trash bags in bins like the rest of America instead of just leaving it out on the street?!” What a great idea. As a result, rat sightings have decreased a reported 14% according to the Department of Sanitation. If rats were a stock, we would not invest in them.

Chick-fil-A Launches Streaming Service 🍿

Yes, this is real. Chick-fil-A (yes, the fast food chain) is really launching a streaming service (yes, a streaming service like Disney+). Details are still relatively unknown, but apparently Chick-fil-A is spending an absolute bag to create & distribute its own original content. We’re all have the same questions here — are these shows about chicken? Why are you doing this? Who is going to actually use this? Honestly, we might have to cook up a family-friendly chicken-themed Sidetalk spinoff. Netflix n’ chill? More like Chick-fil-A n’ chill.

Extra, Extra! 📰

• We took over the city with a huge CitiBike rideout

• A Kentucky man faked his death to avoid paying child support

• The PS5 giveaway winner is Angie C.

• Someone bought a Babe Ruth jersey for $24M